Guilt Over Breastfeeding Problems

Do you have problems breastfeeding?

There are guidelines that women must follow from the very first moment they find out they are pregnant. However, following these guidelines involves making a number of very difficult decisions. There is so much women have to think about when they become mothers; it is a new and exciting world. One of the big decisions is whether to breastfeed or not.

Every woman has her own reasons for choosing breastfeeding or infant formula. On the one hand, there are women who breastfeed, and on the other hand, there are women who have problems breastfeeding or do not want to do so.

We are not trying to start a debate about breast milk against breast milk substitutes. Instead, the goal of this article is to talk about the guilt that new mothers feel when they have trouble breastfeeding, for whatever reason. We are talking about mothers who were obliged to breastfeed but are not able to.

Feeling guilty about having trouble breastfeeding

There are various medical reasons that support the decision not to breastfeed. Examples of this can be certain diseases, low milk production and painful mastitis, among others. These situations have important psychological effects because two strong ideas come into conflict. It is:

• The innate need a mother has to feed her baby
• The impossibility of making it natural

If you translate this into reality, you see situations of absolute frustration. It is the baby who cries out of hunger, and the desperate mother tries everything to feed her baby. This is a case of breastfeeding that simply does not work, for whatever reason.

One day a mother told me that she was scared every time she had to breastfeed her son. She produced a lot of milk, but she had superficial injuries that prevented good sucking. The baby had difficulty getting a good suck, and she also had trouble using a breast pump.

Her suffering and pain were so bad that she once asked herself, “but why do I have to feed you?”. Her nipples were cracked, bleeding and burning all the time. Even the fact that her shirt was close to them was painful. Despite these difficulties, many mothers feel attacked if they do not want to continue. A midwife said to herself, “Well, if you’ve already gotten tired of it… “

When is it time to give up breastfeeding?

Really, is it really necessary? In my opinion, no. The stress and frustration that a mother in this situation transfers to her baby is worse than depriving it of the benefits associated with breast milk.

In the first months of a child’s life, the feeding time is the time when you tie the knot. It is a moment of connection that has emotional benefits for both mother and baby. But if there is pain, it can have the opposite effect.

If a mother ends up here and decides to stop breastfeeding, the next decision is to choose the best possible milk. Milk substitute is completely safe and does not carry any kind of risk to the baby. The pediatrician is the best person to give parents advice in this situation.

Breastfeeding is an option, not an obligation

It is true that breastfeeding encourages emotional bonding between a mother and her baby. However, research shows that not doing so will not prevent the band from forming.

You know that something is wrong in a society where a woman feels judged wrong because she cannot breastfeed. And even worse, that others make her feel that way. The message they should get is: “you are doing well, the most important thing is that you are happy, so you can spread peace to your baby.”

In any case, no one should attack any woman for her decision, as long as the child is safe. Mothers should support each other regardless of their breastfeeding decisions. Each woman is in her own unique situation.

For the women I do not know, you really should not feel bad about choosing to bottle feed your baby if you have trouble breastfeeding. I promise you that your experience as a mother will not be worse. You do not want to be a worse mother. You will give your baby everything they need, and you will be able to offer all the emotional support your infant needs when it’s time to eat.