A Step-by-step Guide To Overcoming Shyness

Trying to overcome shyness can feel like a real challenge. Far from being a disease or disorder, shyness is actually an emotional state that makes you feel ashamed on an emotional level, which can negatively affect your behavior.

A shy person does not shy away from others. Mostly enjoying the company of others. They are not afraid of others either. In reality, they are afraid of feeling vulnerable and of becoming the center of attention.

To overcome shyness, you need to understand what it is all about. It’s definitely not about being introverted. Not all introverts are shy.

What is shyness?

There are three aspects to shyness. First and foremost, we have the organic aspect. According to it, shyness can be genetic. It can also be caused by abnormalities in our internal secretory  glands , especially the pituitary gland and adrenal glands.

Secondly, there is a behavioral aspect that says that shyness is a learned behavior and that it usually begins in childhood. Sometimes it has to do with how you were raised or with the child not feeling valued by their peers or the adults around them. It can also develop after abuse.

Finally, psychologists believe that shyness is a manifestation of an internal conflict. It is associated with the unconscious suppression of one or more instincts.

If a shy person feels vulnerable, they will think they did something wrong and that they cannot defend themselves. They may also feel that their reputation has been affected forever.

A step-by-step guide to overcoming shyness

At least 50% of the population classifies as shy. It is a common problem that creates chaos if it leads to discomfort or pain.

Here are some steps to overcome shyness:

• Identify your shyness. There is a shyness that is global and one that is situation-related. The former is always present. The latter only appears when you are facing certain people or situations. Find out what kind of shyness you have.
• Learn what causes your shyness. Try to remember those times when you felt most ashamed. What do these moments have in common? What factors played the biggest role in making you feel this way? Who made you nervous?

A practical guide

If you feel that shyness keeps you from enjoying life, it may be helpful to go to therapy. These days, there are many ways to overcome shyness.

However, if your shyness is not so crippling, you can always try to move forward by following these strategies:

• Accept your shyness. You have to understand that this is a personality trait that some even find attractive.
• Define 10 situations that trigger it. Make a list of 10 social situations that you are most afraid of. It does not matter if you think they are stupid or trivial. Try to be specific and concise. An example might be that you tell a joke that no one laughs at.
• Organize your information. Go from the simplest situation to the most complex. For example, the simpler situation may not scare you so much, while the most complex one paralyzes you completely.

After following the above steps to overcome shyness, try this:

• Dominate your situations. Once you have defined the stressful situations, start working on them one by one. Try to expose yourself to similar circumstances to go face to face with your fears.
• Discover what makes you embarrassed. When you start to feel ashamed or embarrassed, stop for a moment. Make a note of what you are thinking and feeling. Do not continue until you understand what you are feeling at this very moment.
• Encourage yourself. Have a good posture and appreciate the progress you make. Do not compare yourself with others, and highlight your best qualities.

Shyness in itself is not a problem. However , it becomes a problem when it leads to unpleasant feelings that prevent you from achieving what you want in life.