When I’m Sad, I Need Empathy, Not Ignorance

When you are sad, being empathetic towards this sadness can sometimes be very difficult. First of all, empathizing with the sadness we feel would mean admitting that it exists at all.

It would mean not being ashamed of it and not bothering ourselves that it exists. Sadness tells of a pain that has touched our soul, a sorrow that hurts and needs to be felt.

It would be easy to hide our sadness if it were not for the fact that when one is sad it is often seen as wrong.

“There is no time to be sad. We only get one life, and it is meant to be lived happily and smiling. It’s not worth feeling sad! ” How many times have you heard something like that? Does that sound familiar?

Of course, we all have only one simple life to live. And of course , it would be ideal for us to be happy most of the time and not have problems eating away at our existence.

But the fact is that there are problems. Because life consists of both light and darkness. They coexist in the same room and at the same time.

Sadness must be heard to be understood

We perceive light because of the time we have spent in the dark. Thanks to the darkness, the light shines, enlightening and showing. Therefore, why do we not see sadness in the same way?

It is because of disappointments, goodbye and generally all the blows that life gives us that we can make sense out of certain situations.

This is how we learn lessons that make us who we are, just as the individual grains of sand fill the entire giant beach.

Painful experiences fall through the sight into a pond of wisdom. Darkness inevitably turns into light. It becomes lessons and shows us what we should understand from a certain experience.

So take the time to be with your sadness and understand it. Understand what hurts you and what the meaning behind the current pain is.

When you are sad, surround yourself with people who do not downplay your sadness

No one can take what we feel from us. Not with arguments as banal as “crying does not lead to anything”.

Cry if that’s what you need to do! It does not matter! Because your grief is valuable. Your grief is real and great. Cry if you need to. Crying is a stress reliever. It helps calm the storm inside you. It clears your pain.

Listen to the type of music you want to listen to. Treat your grief as you wish. Take care of yourself and take care of each and every one of your emotions. Give them space to grow and breathe to understand them.

If they are there, it is because there is something in your soul that needs to be heard and taken into account. Surround yourself with people who know how much they value you and your feelings.

People who will not label you weak because you are sad and will not try to tear your sadness from you without empathizing with it first.

There is no greater pain than sharing your scars with someone, so that they are ignored or trivialized. That feeling of not being listened to or appreciated makes the sadness we feel even heavier.

Sharing, instead of ignoring, makes the pain better

Do you remember the time you shared your pain with a close friend, and instead of giving you a cliché, they were just there with you? They just let your sadness exist and shielded it for a while. You talked, cried and even let humor peek out between the meaningless words and tears.

This is the way pain should be handled. Shield and care for it. Take all the time it needs. Be wise  and embrace the pain. Your emotions relax and the meaning behind your grief begins to emerge.

But this meaning will never be visible if we throw out our sadness without immersing ourselves in it first. Then embrace your pain. You will find relief in the right company. And that company, as you well know by now, is nothing but.